First, avoid these words: “referral,” “feature,” and “benefit.” In addition, avoid these inquiries: “If I could get it for less, would you buy it today?” and “Can I help you?” All these do is remind customers that your mission is to sell them something.

The best salespeople are good listeners who react to what the customer says. If a couple say they’re looking for an engagement ring, the typical salesperson will respond: “Our bridal department is right over here. What shape diamond did you have in mind?” A great salesperson listens carefully and understands that the couple are really saying, “We’re getting engaged and planning our wedding and honeymoon. Talk to us about the emotional excitement behind the major event of buying an engagement ring.”

If another couple are looking for a graduation gift for their daughter, a typical response might be: “Did you want to get her a watch or some other type of jewelry?” The great salesperson hears what they’re really saying: “Our daughter is graduating from college, and we’re excited for her and want to share in that emotional excitement with someone.”

Talk to the young couple about the engagement and the wedding plans. Talk to the parents about the graduation, the college, and the celebration. Be a human being who sincerely cares about other human beings and wants to help them celebrate the special times in their lives. Spend two or three minutes discussing what’s really important to the customer, and you’ll be perceived as a friend instead of just another salesperson. Listen to every word customers say and even to what they don’t say directly. Ask the right questions to find out the emotional reason behind the purchase and share in the reason.

Contrary to popular belief, the goal is not to sell every time a customer walks into a jewelry store. The real goal is to develop a relationship and make a friend. Those customers will come back to you for all their future jewelry needs and will tell their friends about the experience they had with you. In other words, the real goal of a sales presentation is personal trade, repeat business, and referral business.