15 Tubular Jewelry Ads From 1983

Hunting for jewelry industry highlights from 1983 for Peggy Jo Donahue, director of public affairs for MJSA and a former JCK­-er, I stumbled upon these 15 totally bangin’ jewelry ads from 1983.

Let me know which one of these made you cry out “Cowabunga!”

Dave Grossman Designs

JCK sales rep Bill Furman tells me these were big sellers. Still, that is one sad, frightening clown.

Tann

The jewelry industry version of Pants on the Ground?

Rayovac

We all know Napoleon preferred pear-shaped sapphire and diamond engagement rings, not watches. You’re not fooling anyone Rayovac.

Aurea

This ad kind of grew on me. Much like the Sphinx is growing out of this poor woman’s head.

Hermes

If you’re not going to show jewelry, you better be sure you depict a winged horse.

Leslie’s

This would be a cool album cover.

Morvant

I love the game show feel to this ad. “Tell them what they’ve won! These gold watches and a giant gold microphone!”

American Greetings Corp.

There is a Louped In rule that states I have to include any ad that features Care Bears.

Bulova

Ditto for ads that feature Ted Turner.

Glodiam

We have a gold dispensing ATM, why can’t we have a diamond gumball machine?

Kaspar & Esh

I’m pretty sure if you look long enough at this model’s eyes, you’ll be cursed. Or her hairdo will appear on your head. 

Michael Anthony Jewelers

Whenever you see “danger” paired with the 1980s, you have to play some Kenny Loggins and watch Top Gun, you just have to.

Guerlin Brothers

Mmmmm…pie…

Ohaus

There are kangaroos in this ad. That about sums it up.

B.D. Elia

To all the goldfish we’ve loved and flushed. We salute you.

For more memories from the 1980s, check out: