Stephen Webster’s 5 Best Quips at the 2017 Gem Awards

Everyone’s favorite unfiltered Englishman Stephen Webster was in fine form on Friday, Jan. 13, as the host with the most of the 15th annual Gem Awards at Cipriani 42nd Street in New York City.

The saucy designer (pictured)—a previous winner and popular presenter—presided over the presentation of the Gem Award for Lifetime Achievement to Jim Rosenheim of Washington, D.C.–based Tiny Jewel Box, plus W magazine’s Grace Fuller (Gem Award for Media Excellence), Bulgari’s Lucia Silvestri (Jewelry Design), Patek Philippe (Watch Excellence), and Kay Jewelers (Marketing & Communications).

Webster was, by all accounts, so popular that we can’t imagine him not being asked to return next year. Hey, Billy Crystal hosted the Oscars nine times!

Here are just a few of our favorite Webster one-liners:

“My long-suffering wife…said if I so much as mentioned her name or embarrassed her by swearing onstage, it’s all over. That’s a very tall order.”

“Some people say that all the nominees are winners. But those people are full of sh—shinola.”

“I’ve been assured that the ballots are top secret. No one knows the winner besides God, Laurence Graff, probably, and the Russian hacking team.”

“I was in a Chow Tai Fook store—it’s okay! I checked. ‘Fook’ is not swearing.”

“Talking of 5,000-year-old men, I’m happy to say we’ve reached that moment of the Lifetime Achievement Award.”

(Photograph by Zach Hilty/BFA.com)